Searching for the Silver Lining

Last month I found out that my  husband’s unit is being deactivated. We don’t yet know what this means specifically for Stephen, but right now, I’m preparing myself for the worst case scenario. In my eyes, that would be Stephen in Germany and me stateside, separated for a whole nother year.

I hate this idea. It would mean another year apart, another year of me living in an apartment that I don’t like, another year working at a job that I’m no longer passionate about, and another year of Stephen living in the barracks. If this is going to be our reality, I feel like I need to find ways to be positive, so I’ve come up with a list of good things about this scenario.

-Geronimo won’t have to fly overseas. Considering what a nut he is, I was really worried about how traveling and living on post would work out for G-mo. Keeping his feet on the ground would be a big upside.

-Another shot at all my hometown races. I will probably run the Dallas White Rock full marathon if I’m here another year. If I’m still here this time next year, I’ll do all the small races that I had to skip this go around. Moving would have meant scaling back on my running big time.

 -More time with my support system. Once we move, I don’t know how often I’ll be able to come home to see my family and friends. More time together now is not a bad thing.

-Job security. Like I said, I’m not feeling my job. I have the best students, but the outside factors (burnout, missing my husband, lame administrators, changes in the district structure) have made me fall out of love with teaching. But, if I move, I’ll have no job. I know that we could make things work if my job situation changed, but it is definitely better financially for me to not be jobless.

 -More time in Texas. I’m ready for a change, and I was really looking forward to having adventures in Germany. I guess if I can’t be there, Texas is the next best place to be. There are many fabulous things about where I live, so I’m happy to soak it up for as long as possible.

Sigh. I’d happily give up almost everything on this list to be with my husband, but I know that’s not how it works. What happens next is up to the Army; we’re just along for the ride.*

10 thoughts on “Searching for the Silver Lining

  1. It’s as if you like your husband or something!😉

    I think you missed a big bullet item: not having to pack up! That’d be my #1, anyway🙂

  2. Good for you for finding ways to look at the situation as positively as you can. I agree with Janelle – packing up and moving is not a pretty process, so it’s not a bad thing to delay it at least for a little while! Hang in there. Things can change very quickly in both directions, so you never know what might happen later today, tomorrow, next week, or next month! I know it’s hard, but try to enjoy the moment, such as your fantastic half marathon results and your upcoming marathon, which you are going to ROCK!

  3. Not knowing is the worst. I hope all this indecision will clear up soon, so you’ll know where you’ll be living next year. It’s great that you’re looking on the brightside and I do agree with the above comments that packing up your life and sending it across the Atlantic ocean is a bit of a pain. Living in Germany would be an incredible opportunity, but I hope that no matter the outcome, you’ll be able to live in the same house as Stephen sooner rather than later.

  4. If your stuck here, maybe you should look for a different apartment, maybe the newness would be of some help???? I know Stephen is not thrilled with the thought of being without you for the next year either, but you could visit!

  5. That totally blows. I guess another silver lining is the savings part, which goes with the job security. You guys seem to have worked hard to pay things off and save- a whole other year and not moving would probably add to that, meaning a down payment on a house or whatever it is you guys have as far as goals.

    Can you ever visit?

    • That’s a good point. Since I’ve been living on my own, I’ve become very frugal.

      I can visit, but it’s tricky during the school year. I used up most of my days off when Stephen was home on R&R because I figured I wouldn’t need them any more. At least with teaching we get summer break, winter break, and spring break.*

  6. I’m still hoping that you get go to Germany — just another base that is still active. You are being very positive about your outlook and I think that is a great way to be as you just never know whats going to happen with the army. I just hope for you that you will get to live in the same place as your hubs.

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