Thursday night I went to see Hunger Games. It was a little treat to myself for surviving a crazy work week. The movie was great, but something about the whole experience had me feeling so sad.
I must have been overdue for some deployment blues. I came home and just felt bad. I spent some time sitting on the floor crying and went to bed early. I was hoping that I’d wake up feeling better, but I didn’t. I put on my happy face at work, but on the drive home, I listened to the Dixie Chicks very loudly and cried more. As I (and Shrek) always say, better out than in. Once I got all the tears out, I started to feel a little better.
The obnoxious thing about deployment is that it really messes with your emotions. Sometimes I feel sad when I “should” feel happy and vice versa. And often my feelings come out as extremes. Little things can push me over the edge. (Like watching Peeta lovingly touch Katniss’s hair toward the end of the movie – that’s what made me so upset.)
All that sadness got washed away this morning. Stephen called me! We were able to talk for an hour. I got to hear about all that he’s been up to and I’ve gotten to tell him everything I’ve been doing. I was able to laugh and ask his opinion and joke and talk about mundane things. Now I feel like I was never sad at all. In fact, I feel great. Oh, deployment, why do you do me like this?*