Last month I found out that my husband’s unit is being deactivated. We don’t yet know what this means specifically for Stephen, but right now, I’m preparing myself for the worst case scenario. In my eyes, that would be Stephen in Germany and me stateside, separated for a whole nother year.
I hate this idea. It would mean another year apart, another year of me living in an apartment that I don’t like, another year working at a job that I’m no longer passionate about, and another year of Stephen living in the barracks. If this is going to be our reality, I feel like I need to find ways to be positive, so I’ve come up with a list of good things about this scenario.
-Geronimo won’t have to fly overseas. Considering what a nut he is, I was really worried about how traveling and living on post would work out for G-mo. Keeping his feet on the ground would be a big upside.
-Another shot at all my hometown races. I will probably run the Dallas White Rock full marathon if I’m here another year. If I’m still here this time next year, I’ll do all the small races that I had to skip this go around. Moving would have meant scaling back on my running big time.
-More time with my support system. Once we move, I don’t know how often I’ll be able to come home to see my family and friends. More time together now is not a bad thing.
-Job security. Like I said, I’m not feeling my job. I have the best students, but the outside factors (burnout, missing my husband, lame administrators, changes in the district structure) have made me fall out of love with teaching. But, if I move, I’ll have no job. I know that we could make things work if my job situation changed, but it is definitely better financially for me to not be jobless.
-More time in Texas. I’m ready for a change, and I was really looking forward to having adventures in Germany. I guess if I can’t be there, Texas is the next best place to be. There are many fabulous things about where I live, so I’m happy to soak it up for as long as possible.
Sigh. I’d happily give up almost everything on this list to be with my husband, but I know that’s not how it works. What happens next is up to the Army; we’re just along for the ride.*